Sugar for the Soul

The best of all gifts

around any Christmas tree:

the presence of a happy family

all wrapped up in each other.

~Burton Hillis

We made our beautiful, rolled cookies. They are a delight to see, to touch, to taste, and to smell. The house is full of the malty, warm aroma which says "Christmas cookie."

It's a really good thing that I made extra dough, even though it made me even more exhausted than I normally am after baking these. Our cookie process takes two days. First day, we make the dough, roll and cut the cookies, and then bake them. On the second day, we ice them.

After icing the cookies and decorating them with sprinkles, we let them dry overnight. While we sleep, the icing soaks down into the cookies and fills them with vanilla.

After the first day, my grown sons were taking the plain, unadorned cookies from the platter in little piles and dunking them into their coffee! I am so happy we are all together this Christmas that I didn't say a word.

The next morning, I slipped downstairs at 6:30 to trim the excess icing off the edges and carefully pack the cookies between layers of wax paper. A stack of cookie tins sits ready and waiting for my extended family -- this is my offering to them this year.

No one ever complains about getting our heirloom treats for their Christmas present, because these are not just pretty cookies.

They are sugar for the soul.

They wrap their goodness around us and fill the very air with bliss. They are love from our own hands -- manifested in a few inches of crisp-tender crunch and velvety icing.

They say "Merry" and "Joy to the World" and " Welcome Home" all at once.

This is why I make them, even though it makes me tired.

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Are there things you doing for your family this year, because they are especially meaningful, even though it makes you tired?

Sugar Cookies

Sweets with sweets

war not,

joy delights in joy.

- William Shakespeare

Right now, I am setting up the kitchen for my biggest cookie project: rolled sugar cookies. It will take me all weekend, from start to finish.

We've made these cookies every year since we were married, from a recipe that has been handed down through my husband's family since the 1800's.

When one of my grown sons told me that we have to make them this year, spite of the fact that we are not living in our own house and in a temporary situation, I was surprised.

But I shouldn't have been.

It's all about joy. We are made for joy. We cannot live without it.

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What are you doing for joy this Christmas?

Christmas Bustle

I finished my Christmas shopping yesterday and picked up some groceries before the incoming snow storm. I also managed to find gloves for everyone in the family, a snow shovel, ice scraper for the windshield, and some small bags of road salt. I got home just in time for cooking supper.

One of my guests is feeling poorly with a cold. I attended to that, set up the tea and honey, medicine, vitamins, Kleenex, and so forth. I cleaned the kitchen. (Actually, there are two in this house, both being used at the moment.) I perused the many boxes arriving for the 25th. Each day, there are more boxes.

By the time I got to bed, I was one tired cookie.

I slept in because I was so tired. I awoke this morning to a snowy world. You can read all about the snow on my other blog, The Moonboat Cafe. I ate my breakfast between 9:00 and 10:30 in a fog with various family members and guests coming and going. Somewhere in all of that, I made two of our favorite coffee cakes and cooked some bacon and brewed three (!) pots of coffee. One of my guests wrapped gifts in the breakfast nook and chatted with me while I worked.

For breakfast, we had:

Coffeecake

Bacon

Orange Juice

Eggnog

Coffee or tea

Everyone munched happily while we listened to Louis Armstrong's holiday songs and watched the snow piling up outside. It's so good to see everyone happy and together. I know I should cherish it now, while I can.

So I did.

That's why I am here, late, writing for you. But I know you won't mind. Can't you just see us, laughing and chatting and enjoying our special breakfast together while the nearly miraculous white Christmas happens around us?

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What are you doing today?

Chocolate Chip Blondies

Think what a better world

it would be if we all,

the whole world,

had cookies and milk

about three o'clock every afternoon

and then lay down

on our blankets for a nap.

- Robert Fulghum, 1987, Middlebury College

If you love chocolate chip cookies, but don't have time to make them, you'll love this recipe. That's why we created it. We were short on time. We wanted the taste of chocolate chip cookies, but we didn't have the afternoon to make them. So we put them in a pan -- in the same style as our favorite bar cookie. These are buttery rich and satisfying, but beautifully simple and quick.

Cassandra's Chocolate Chip Blondies

Ingredients:

1 stick of margarine or butter

2 eggs or equivalent egg substitute

2 cups brown sugar

2 teaspoons vanilla

2 cups flour

2 teaspoons baking powder

1/4 teaspoon salt

6 oz dark chocolate chips

Directions:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit.

Melt the butter in the microwave.

Add brown sugar, eggs, and vanilla with a wire whisk.

Blend in 1 cup flour, baking powder and salt.

Stir in the remaining cup of flour and the chocolate chips.

Pour batter into a lightly greased 8 x 12 baking pan. I find the 9 x 13 size pan is really too large.

Bake at 350 degrees for 25 minutes or until the top is lightly browned and firm.

Cool on a rack, in the pan for 5 - 10 minutes.

Slice brownies while still warm.

Lower Fat Version:

Substitute 4 egg whites (or equivalent egg substitute) for the 2 eggs.

Use 1/4 cup margarine or butter plus 1/4 cup fat-free plain yogurt.

Richer Version:

Use 9-12 oz chocolate chips instead of 6. These are very rich.

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Of course, you could use any flavor of chips in this recipe: white chocolate, peanut butter, butterscotch, milk chocolate, mint chocolate, or dark chocolate. What's your favorite kind of chip? What kind do you put in your cookies?

Understanding Holiday Stress

There's more going on in my life than I can quite keep up with. Do you ever feel the same way, especially over the holidays?

That's where I am today, right now.

80% of our stress flows from two or three pressure points. I am convinced of this, having done my own research on it for over 25 years. My primary pressure points are two:

• relational tension or conflict with someone I love or respect.

• situations that require multi-tasking (especially at a rapid pace).

I work by focusing on one task intensely at the time. I work towards harmony with others. I am slow and detail-oriented. But I can create fine things --

• the turn of a phrase that hits your heart just right,
• the picture that calls up your childhood longings,
• the cake that melts in your mouth,
• the garden flowers that flow over your soul like the first snow,
• the gift that meets the need you didn't know you had -- with an elegance and eloquence you've been thirsting for,
• the look of compassion and understanding that lets you know you're not alone.

With me, you may feel warmed, comforted, uplifted, and embraced. You may notice that I'm listening to you like no one has ever listened to you before. And you may suddenly notice that you've has been missing this kind of welcome for a very long time.

That's what I do. Create and nurture. To me, it's like breathing.

But I'm not fast. I'm not quick. I'm not clever. I'm not savvy. I'm not charming. I'm not good at juggling several tasks at once. I'm cautious to a fault. I'm clunky and awkward in situations that expect me to do things I haven't thought about yet, that require natural boldness, or that push me to perform under an unexpected deadline. There, I flounder.

Much of my life as a homeschooling mother put stress on my two pressure points. Homeschooling required multi-tasking. A lot of multi-tasking. It also meant a lot of relational tension and conflict. I had to confront problems and insist that the work be done to a certain standard, nearly every day. These were the main reasons I thought I wasn't suited for it.

But one day, I realized that other moms who were completely different from me felt the same way: that they weren't suited to it, either. They had a different set of reasons. They insisted that I had the ideal personality for homeschooling!

The simple truth is, we all have pressure points. Raising a family, building a home, even teaching our own -- these are demanding jobs that require many types of tasks and abilities. So regardless of our natural temperament and gifts, we will feel the stress upon our pressure points. We will feel it.

And most of us will feel it over the holidays, when we are expected to do more.

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What are your pressure points? Are there situations or demands that are especially stressful for you?

Scottish Shortbread

My grandmother was a remarkable woman. Widowed in early midlife, she ran her husband's business, studied art, and traveled the world. After her trip to Scotland, she brought back a recipe for shortbread. It was from her that I learned about these cookies and learned how to make them.

I made shortbread this past Friday because my sons requested it. Now I watch my college son pull out a piece and put it on a plate beside his coffee. He dips it (!) into his coffee and then puts it in his mouth and closes his eyes. He sits still and slowly chews and swallows. He looks over at me, winks, and nods. Yes, this is it.

The ingredients for our Scottish shortbread are just four: flour, butter, sugar, and vanilla. But the results are divine. These cookies will absolutely melt in your mouth. Earlier shortbread recipes used oat flour, which is made from grinding oats. If you need to avoid gluten, you can make the oat flour version of this recipe -- just substitute oat flour for the plain flour and reduce your flour to 1 and 1/4 cups.

Scottish Shortbread

Ingredients:

1 and 1/3 cups flour

3 tablespoons sugar

1/2 cup butter (for unsalted butter, add 1/2 teaspoon salt)

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

(1/8 cup milk for basting)

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 325 degrees Fahrenheit.

2. In a medium-size mixing bowl, soften the butter. I use the microwave for 20-30 seconds. This makes the butter soft like whipped topping. If the butter is unsalted, then add 1/2 teaspoon salt to the butter and stir it in.

3. Mix the flour and sugar into the butter with a wooden spoon and then finish the blending job with your fingers. The mixture will be crumbly.

4. Drizzle the vanilla over the dough and work it in evenly. No need to knead the dough, however. This is not loaf bread. Blend the dough just long enough to get it mixed evenly. The vanilla should provide just enough moisture to make the dough stick together in a nice round ball. If the dough is too gooey to make a ball, add flour by the tablespoon until it makes a ball. If the dough is too dry to stick together, add water by the teaspoon until it sticks.

5. Divide the dough in half and shape it into two balls.

6. Flatten each ball into a disc 5-6 inches in diameter ( about the length of your hand) onto an ungreased cookie sheet. If your discs are on the same cookie sheet together, place them one inch apart. Using your thumb and forefinger, push the edge of the dough into a scalloped shape. Slice the dough with a sharp knife into 8 wedges. Brush the tops lightly with milk.

7. Bake at 325 for 20-25 minutes, until the edges are lightly brown. Shortbread is very blonde. You should not brown it the way you do most of your cookies.

8. After removing from the oven, slice the wedges again with your sharp knife (along the same lines you cut before baking). Let sit for five minutes. Remove gently with a spatula to a cooling rack.

9. Once cool, the cookies can be stored in any container with a lid. I can store them for a week at room temperature. If you will be storing them for longer, you should put them in the fridge.

Why I use unsalted butter: unsalted butter has a shorter shelf life. That means the unsalted butter you buy in the store is likely to be fresher than the salted varieties. It will make better cookies. Also, the amount of salt in salted butter is higher than is ideal for cookies. Salt masks other flavors when more than a small amount is used. And for an authentic Scottish taste, unsalted butter is the best option.

If you can't find unsalted butter, the salted varieties will work fine. I have used them sometimes and no one seemed to have a problem enjoying the cookies!

Serving Suggestions:

This recipe does not make a lot of cookies. Just 16. So you may wish to double or triple it. I usually triple the recipe for Christmas.

These cookies are lovely in a tin or on a plate, as a contrast to other sweeter cookies and cookies with icing. But they are fragile. So treat them tenderly.

All recipes, copyright 2009 by Cassandra Frear.

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Did your grandmother make cookies? What was your favorite cookie as a child?

Power Cook

That's me! Yesterday in my kitchen! Whoo hoo!

I made carob brownies, chocolate chip brownies, Scottish shortbread, and Holiday Coffee Cake. But I'm not going to keep all the glory to myself. I'm going to share my luscious recipes with you! Although I normally don't post on Apple Pie over the weekend, I'm making an exception this weekend because:

• it's Advent -- a very special time of year,

• "we are having a party,"

• my heart is full and overflowing with joy,

• you are my special bloggy friends,

• and many of you are inside right now baking your hearts out.

So merry, merry, merry Christmas from me!

This morning I am eating my Holiday Coffee Cake. I created this recipe myself. It reminds me of the rich, fruit-bountiful recipes of my childhood. I made it yesterday for the first morning my college son is home. Just think: he will wake up to this wonderful cake and his favorite coffee and a hug from mom! Does it get any better?

Cassandra's Holiday Coffee Cake

Ingredients:

3 cups plain flour

1 tablespoon baking powder

1/2 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 teaspoon salt

3 Tablespoons oat bran or wheat germ or fine oats

1/2 cup flax eggs or 4 egg whites

1 and 1/2 cups sugar or 1 cup fructose

1 cup orange juice

1 apple

1 cup of fresh cranberries

1/2 cup applesauce

3/4 cup raisins

4-6 oz chopped nuts

Directions:

1. Preheat your oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit.

2. Lightly spray a 9 x 13 inch glass baking dish with canola baking oil spray.

3. Select three mixing bowls: large, medium, and small.

4. Blend the first five dry ingredients in a large mixing bowl. Set aside.

5. Beat the flax eggs or egg whites with a fork for a minute in the medium bowl. Directions for making flax eggs are below. Beat the sugar into the eggs until the mixture is well-blended and frothy, just a minute or two. Set it aside.

6. Peel and dice the apple. Put the apple pieces in the cup of orange juice in the small bowl. Let the apple soak for a minute.

7. Chop the cranberries. I like to chop each berry in half, but you don't have to be that precise about it.

8. Pour the apple mixture, chopped cranberries, applesauce, raisins, and nuts on top of the flax egg/egg white blend. Fold the fruit into the eggs.

9. Now pour your blended wet ingredients on top of your dry ingredient in the large bowl. Stir with a large, stiff spoon until it is just moistened and there are no dry spots.

10. Put the batter into the prepared baking dish and spread evenly.

11. Bake at 350 for 30-45 minutes, until the top is golden brown and the sides have pulled away slightly from the pan. The top of the bread will be springy to the touch.

Serving Suggestions:

You can eat this hot or cold the next day. I would recommend waiting ten minutes to serve it because the fruit in the cake is very hot. You may wish to decorate your cake with a simple icing. I prefer the simple flavors of the cake itself without any added sweetness.

This Coffee Cake is very low in fat. It's a heart-healthy recipe!

All recipes, copyright 2009 by Cassandra Frear.

Try Flax Eggs!

You will notice that many of my recipes mention the use of flax eggs. I'm a vegetarian, for health reasons. I do occasionally eat egg whites. But I prefer to use flax eggs. They are full of healthy fats and other important nutrients. Flax eggs are an excellent substitute for eggs.

I store flax seeds and ground flax seeds (also called "flax meal") in my fridge for at least six months. I probably have stored them longer than that. I prefer to store the ground flax seeds in a sturdy plastic, airtight container or Ziplock bag.

To make flax eggs: If you wish to try flax eggs, there are two ways to make them.

Method 1: blend 1/4 cup ground flax seed with 1/2 cup hot tap water. Let this soak for 10-15 minutes. Beat lightly with a fork. The mixture will be the consistency of egg whites. You can grind your flax seeds in a coffee grinder. Just pulse a few times until your seeds look like fine cornmeal.

Method 2: Put 1/2 cup flax seeds and 1 cup warm water in your blender. Run the blender on medium for a minute. The mixture will turn thick, like egg whites. Remove the flax eggs from your blender and clean the blender with a hot water spray, then wash it in warm soapy water.

You can make flax eggs in larger amounts and store them in the fridge in a covered, airtight container or lidded jar. In my experience, flax eggs stay fresh in the refrigerator for up to ten days.

1/4 flax egg mixture is equivalent to one egg or two egg whites.

I use flax eggs in any recipe (except puddings and custards) instead of eggs: muffins, cookies, pancakes, breads, layer cakes, coffee cakes, and so forth. They do not work as a substitute for scrambled or fried eggs. For that, I have a tofu recipe!

Cookie Wars

You knew it was coming. I should have known it was coming. But none of us knew it was coming this soon.

First cookie recipe of the season. I thought I had the ingredients. Then I realized there was NO PEANUT BUTTER.

No peanut butter in the house? I shopped for groceries a few days ago. How does this happen?

I checked the time: 5:15. What the heck, the night was still young. So I went to the store. I bought the peanut butter and a few other needed groceries for my arriving guests tomorrow. When I got home, I started making the cookies.

Unfortunately, I was watching the Weather Channel at the same time. I was transfixed by those poor souls in the middle of lake-effect snow storms and blizzards. (If you live there, here's a big hug.) I had vivid memories of our winters in the Poconos. I shivered in my warm kitchen. I put in twice as many oats as the recipe required.

Then I mixed the batter and wondered why it looked like granola. Why were my cookies falling apart? They had never looked like this before! 15 minutes later, I realized what I had done. By this time, it was too late to heat and add more wet ingredients. I had to work fast before the dough hardened completely.

I tried adding a bit more melted margarine. The batter still looked like granola. I was upset. Upset with myself and the whole thing. Alright, then! I carried the pot of dough to the sink, turned on the faucet, and spritzed the cookie batter with the spray nozzle. Now the batter stuck together.

The rest of the cookies were squishy.

Josh tasted them. Too many oats, he said. How did he know? How did he know right away?

Want me to mail you some no-bake cookies? I think we'll have a surplus this year.

I'm baking something easy today. One of my guests has requested my carob brownies. That's the recipe I shared with you earlier. For the carob version, I replace the cocoa with carob powder.

Carob seems so comforting and reassuring. It will go well with the "Holiday Spice" coffee Josh invented this week. Oh, didn't I tell you? He adds a pinch of cinnamon and nutmeg to the grounds before brewing. It's surprisingly good.

Maybe he should help me with the brownies.

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What's cooking in your kitchen today?

Why Cookies?

We've baked cookies every Christmas since we were married. My sons have not known a Christmas without them. We've had them on a tray, along with breads and other goodies, when guests visited. We've sent them in boxes to loved ones. We've enjoyed them in the evenings by the tree with a devotional reading. As one of my sons said years ago, we make cookies at Christmas because we're having a party.

It isn't surprising that my sons would request this simple tradition after a year of upheaval.

But still, it surprised me. I thought they had outgrown it. That was my mistake. We never outgrow our need for joy and comfort.

Today, our family will begin making our cookies. At Thanksgiving, each family member selected their top five favorites. I hope to bake a different type each day and create as many favorites as we can. My friends have been asking me for the recipes. That made me think that my Apple Pie friends would enjoy seeing these recipes, too. So I've decided to post our cookie recipes and cookie baking stories here on Apple Pie for the next two weeks.

If you don't like reading about cookies, know that this will only last through the holiday season. After New Year's Day, we'll move on to other topics. But right now,

It's a holly jolly Christmas -- the best time of the year!

Oh, by golly, have a holly, jolly Christmas this year!

Can't you just hear me singing? That was one of my favorite Christmas songs from my childhood.

Here's the link to the first set of cookies: No-Bake Oatmeal Cookies.

These taste a lot like fudge with peanut butter in it. They're very rich. I make them small, so that eating one is like eating a piece of candy. One of the things I like about these cookies is that if you don't have time to "bake" cookies, you can still make them. And they feel luxurious.

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Do you have a favorite no-bake cookie?

Not Alone

I am not alone at all, I thought.

I was never alone at all.

And that, of course,

is the message of Christmas.

We are never alone.

Not when the night is darkest,

the wind coldest,

the world seemingly most indifferent.

For this is still the time God chooses.

- Taylor Caldwell

For those of you who have been waiting to hear about our tree this year, here's what happened.

The Saturday after Thanksgiving, my college son Ben was lying on the couch. He looked at me and asked, "Can we put up the tree today?" Sure. I was already planning it as a possibility.

"Can we do it today? I want to do at least some of it." The last time I had heard anything like this from him, he was under the age of eight.

These are longings of the heart that every mother listens for. He didn't need to say anymore. I understood. I pulled out the box. He set up his laptop to play old-fashioned Christmas music for us -- Louis Armstrong, Nat King Cole, Bing Crosby, Ella Fitzgerald. He helped me unpack our new tree and arrange it with the lights on it. Other people trickled in to help hang the ornaments. Two hours later, we were finished.

He said to me, "I'm glad we have a tree. Not having one would be too depressing." Yes, son, I know. God knew it, too, long before I did. He arranged for this moment.

There are no words I can say. I'm just taking it in. The happy faces, the glowing tree, the music, the laughter, and my Lord, invisible but clearly present, smiling over us.

Our yuletide gift sits in the corner, twinkling merrily, with little white lights and green, red, and gold ornaments. Our tree in the wilderness. How good it is.

Epiphany on Ice

I wrote this two years ago. It fits my life now so well, it appears to be prophetic. I can't resist sharing it with you . . .

December 10, 2007

The most meaningful moments of my life come upon me unexpectedly -- almost never at the "big" events where I look for them. Today, I had one.

Yesterday was a grind. We were kept inside by the winter weather once again -- very depressing for someone whose primary outing is a walk outside. But I rallied by getting things done. I finished decorating the tree. This had become an unpleasant task after three sets of lights on the tree went out. Up and down the ladder, back and forth with the mess, alone in a task that was getting more annoying with each effort to complete it. The job should have lasted a weekend but had already taken nine days, and now it felt especially difficult because tears were just under the surface. The tree decorating added to the gray feelings that have plagued me all fall. It's a long story, but suffice it to say that there have been too many delicate relational issues to navigate this year and too many disappointments that have crashed in on my shores.

Once the tree was done, it was time for paying the bills. This job makes me tense and requires that I keep a firm grip on my emotions. Just the facts, just get the job done, don't feel -- just do it, I kept saying to myself. I was grateful to finish, even though it took way too long (like the tree decorating) and left my head feeling woozy.

As soon as I had finished with the bills, I noticed the rain. No. I noticed that it was 30 degrees and raining. Ice was immediately evident. I jumped into action to prepare for a power outage. Once this was done, I spent the rest of the evening shopping online, the most pleasant thing I did all day. But still I felt cheerless. Just the facts, just get the job done, don't feel -- just do it. Don't think too much about the people. Just do the needed task. Time is the issue here, not feelings.

We awoke to an icy world the next morning, but we still had power. After a moment of thanks, I slipped into my routine tasks for the day, and it passed in a blur. Late afternoon found us outside, scraping thick ice off the driveway and sidewalk. More of the grind of life. Don't feel, just do it -- just get the job done. My son went inside and left me to sprinkle salt on the pavement. By now, it was twilight in the woods. I was nearly finished with my chore when a sweep of memories washed over me. I caught my breath.

Then I noticed it. The beauty around me -- the trees glistening silver with ice, the pretty house against the snow with candles in the windows, the smell of wood smoke perfectly blended into the crisp winter air. There was a shift in my universe. I was lifted above the endless chores, the irritations, the disappointments, the relational tensions, and my feelings of doubt and inadequacy. I saw my life in a new way. I saw the labor of love which has been pleasing to God. I saw the sacrifices which fill his eyes with pride. I saw what we fought so hard to build and that nothing can take that from us -- that we did it. We beat the odds. We built a home of warmth and love and laughter against, and in spite of, the pressing darkness.

It came to me joyfully, solemnly, quietly, on the songs of little birds and the drip, drip, drip of icicles dangling like crystals from the storm, and it sang, "Christmas is here. Emmanuel. God is with us; Here, with us." God helped us to love as He loves and to build as He builds and to endure as he endures. He is with us and in us. In Him, we move and breathe and understand. This is Christmas.

It was fresh like morning, strong like a lion, jolly like an elf, and tender like a child -- all at once. Wood smoke and snow and greenery and crystals and songs and I standing there among it, with head bowed, drinking it in.

Hallelujah, Emmanuel.

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Photograph, copyright 2009 by Benjamin Frear.

Thanksgiving Week

When we were homeschooling, we took a week's vacation over Thanksgiving.

By this point in the year, I was ready for a serious break. We all were. My kids were getting irritable and had a number of complaints against the teacher and life in general. I was feeling, more often than not, that I didn't care if they were miserable. I had started sighing a lot, which is always a bad sign.

So we took a week off, as soon as I could wrap up the lessons and close the shutters on the school room.

During that week, I prepared for Thanksgiving, but I also did a few other things. I took a day just for me -- a day when I played and slept and dreamed and used disposable dishes. (Hint: the Friday after Thanksgiving is ideal because there are leftovers!) On all the other days, I worked on everything but school. I cleaned the house for the holidays and made the kids help me. I stocked up on baking supplies -- we all loved doing that. I checked and filled in our holiday calendar. I pulled the decorations out of the attic. I put up the Advent calendar. Over the weekend, we put up our artificial trees. Often, we had time to finish all our decorating for the season. And of course, I pulled out the Christmas music and played it at full volume while we worked.

Notice what I did not do. I did not shop! No Black Friday for me! I avoided the crowds, the traffic, and the long lines.

Our preparations made the house feel cheery and charged everyone's batteries, including mine. It was a break from the mundane that transformed our little world and reminded us to enjoy the moment. When we returned to school a week later, we were all in better spirits. We liked each other again. And I had a head start on the holidays.

This year will be unlike any other our family has experienced. My college son will be here, and we will be celebrating another year when we can all be together. Although many things are different now, I think I will put up our surprise tree and play Christmas music and make sure we have supplies for baking.

And, in keeping with our tradition, I will take this week off from writing for Apple Pie. I do still hope to write some posts for the Moonboat Cafe , and you're welcome to wander over there for a break from it all anytime.

See you next week!

Advent Season: Just for Joy

I don't know how my old rolling pin went into the car on that day in late June. It was a crazy mix of the planned, the unplanned, and the unimaginable. We had sold our house and the closing came sooner than expected. We scrambled to move ourselves out and clean the house in two weeks. Most of our things went into storage, since we would be staying with family in the interim period. We took only the things we needed for the summer: clothing, Bibles, shoes, essential files, and a few dishes.

Or so we thought.

How did my rolling pin go in? I have no answer. No explanation, except that perhaps a Christmas angel slipped it in quietly while I was having a coffee break before the kitchen box was taped shut.

I've had the rolling pin for as long as I've had children. It has rolled out cookie dough every Christmas for twenty-five years. We've cut, baked, and decorated our signature cookies each year with a recipe that has been in the family since the mid-1800's. We've done other types of cookies, too, but these are the showcase cookies -- pretty shapes, colorful icing, decorations, drawing ooh's and aah's.

I wasn't going to make them this year. The house we're living in isn't our own. The cookies make a lot of work. They make a mess. It didn't seem wise. I wouldn't have my usual equipment -- cookies cutters, decorating supplies, pans, etc. I certainly wasn't going to buy all of it again. Did my grown children really need cookies? Wasn't Christmas just about Jesus? Surely, we could do without, if by some strange twist of fate we were still in North Carolina in December.

This is why I couldn't figure out how the rolling pin turned up in the kitchen supplies. That's odd. How did that happen? I wondered. In July, our grandma gave us snowflake cookie cutters. In October, a good friend sent cookie-decorating supplies. No, we hadn't talked about it. How did she know? Then last week, I talked to my college son, who is looking forward to being with us over the holiday.

He said, "We have to make cookies." No question about it. Could I tell him no? Of course not.

I had no idea it mattered. Sometimes God prepares for us before we have any idea of our need. I didn't expect to be here for Christmas. I didn't think my sons cared about the cookies. I didn't think we'd need to make it feel more like home.

But God knew, didn't he?

It gets even better. Last week, I was wondering whether or not I should buy a few more cookie cutters. I could have asked for the money, but I didn't want to spend it on something that wasn't essential. For some reason, I felt like I should clean out my purse. There, in an old envelope, was some gift money I'd forgotten about. That same day, I stumbled across a box of 15 cookie cutters for a great price. This is it. You can do this without any concern for the budget, just for the sake of joy, the thought went through my head.

Just for the sake of joy. I stood still. Does God really care about this? Isn't he busy with more important things? Then suddenly, I understood. What we carry in our hearts is the important thing. It matters that I open my heart and my hands to create for my family the cheer they long for right now. Yes, it matters.

Snowflakes, the homemade kind, were falling from the sky, again. Just for joy.

Smart Choices: Apple Snack

"'Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?'

'That depends a good deal on where you want to get to,' said the Cat.

'I don't much care where --' said Alice.

'Then it doesn't matter which way you go,' said the Cat.

'--so long as I get somewhere,' Alice added as an explanation."

- Lewis Carroll, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland

The holidays are full of surprises and more surprises. While we do have plenty of structured, shared meals around the holidays, I often find that I don't have time to prepare snacks and meals when I am working hard to make the holidays happen. I can feel rather disoriented like Alice in her new world, not quite sure where I am going or how I am to get there.

I used to resent it all. But then I realized that it wasn't anyone's fault, and I did have choices. Lots of choices. As I said before, if we are going to live well and live deeply, we can't do it all. We will have to choose to neglect a few things and to simplify. There are many good things we can do, but only a few of them are best. I try to deliberately streamline my expectations so that I have time for what matters most. I like to say that I am making a smart choice.

The snack I am sharing today is one of my "smart choices" for the holidays. It's low in calories, but full of flavor, texture, and fun. Instead of feeling the need to create home-baked goodies, when I am short on time, I offer this.

First, I peel and slice fresh apples. Dipping the slices in orange juice or a 50/50 lemon juice and water mixture will keep them from turning brown. I arrange them on a plate and put Marzetti's Caramel Apple Dip in the center. Nearby I place some favorite nuts and some mini-bagels. The bagels can even be sliced into halves and piled high on a platter. Plain bagels and cinnamon bagels work very well for this. Toothpicks near the apples keep them clean. I can also put Marzetti's dip near the bagels so that people realize they can use it on their bagels, too. Of course, you'll want some small bowls or plates and a spoon for the dip. I serve coffee and or tea with this.

If you have a nearby farmer's market or apple orchard, fresh apples can be a very economical choice at this time of year. You'll be amazed at the difference in quality and price, compared to the offerings in grocery stores. A trip to the orchard or market can also be an interesting school outing.

I have served this to my family instead of cookies or other treats when we want to celebrate something special over the holidays. It's a great tree-trimming snack, and a great, spontaneous pick-me-up after shopping together for gifts.

Marzetti has recently created a fat-free version of their caramel dip and has begun offering it in small individual-sized cups which are perfect for children. You can find the dip in the fresh produce section of your grocery store, often near the apples.

You can go here to view some of the Marzetti apple dip products.

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Do you have a favorite easy recipe that you like to use over the holidays?

Advent Season: Snowflakes

It's already happening.

The sweet discovery of God with us in this has begun to fall from the sky like early snowflakes. Just a few, but enough to cause wonder.

Several weeks ago, I had decided we would not have a Christmas tree this year. We've always had one. But, as I said before, all of our decorations and trees are 700 miles away in storage. We've been living without a regular salary for nearly a year. Was it really worth the cost and trouble to set up a tree? I couldn't justify the expense. I couldn't justify the effort. After all, we're adults. We can manage without one. Christmas is about Jesus, anyway. Not a tree. We can get down to the purity of the season, without all the trappings and noise of our cultural expectations. And maybe that would be something I would like -- a simplified Christmas with less to do. I set my expectations that way.

Then, talking to my family, I realized. After the past year, having no tree would be too bleak. Would we adjust quietly and not complain? Yes, of course. We're all doing our part to make this experience as positive as possible. But something in the faces and voices of my family spoke to me. I can't exactly explain it. Somehow, I suddenly knew I should pray for, hope for, look for a way to decorate the house. I should be bold and look towards a tree.

The first snowflake fell.

I remembered that we had collected coins from all over the house "for a party" after we moved. These coins, still in a box, need to be rolled and deposited in the bank. Why not a Christmas party? Why not a Christmas tree? I had also been given some money for my birthday.

I decided to work on this tree project without telling my family. It would be my surprise for them. I did not even tell my husband about it.

I would have to find an artificial tree, because I'm allergic to pines, so I started scanning trees and decorations online. With a bit of searching, I found a few stores offering trees for under $50 and ornament packages for under $30. My mother-in-law and I went shopping last night. I did not expect to buy anything yet, just scope out the options and be open to possibilities.

Wouldn't you know? We discovered a sweet tree with white lights for $35 and an ornament package for $15. It will just fit in the corner of the room. These were such a good buy that they were disappearing rapidly. In fact, there were only two trees left. I knew I didn't need to look anymore. Here it was. The answer.

One snowflake had been joined by a dozen.

I started singing, right in there in the store, "We Need a Little Christmas," a show tune from the Broadway musical Mame. I didn't even know I remembered it.

For we need a little Christmas,

right this very minute,

Candles in the windows,

Carols at the spinet.

Yes, we need a little Christmas,

right this very minute,

need a little Christmas now!

I was so happy, I didn't care that other shoppers were giving me some uneasy glances. Let 'em look. Let 'em think.

Snowflakes were falling from the sky and it was beautiful.

Advent Season: A Holiday to Remember

This week I began thinking about the holidays. For me, this usually starts the second week in November. The leaves have all come down, the wind has turned cold, and I am ready for Thanksgiving.

This week, I had conversations with our college son about his travel plans, his schedule, and what he wants to do with us. My mother-in-law and I found a few decorations in a closet that can be installed at the right time. I started thinking about Thanksgiving dinner and putting up a Christmas tree.

But this year is unlike any other for us.

We are living in a home generously loaned to us by family. Our Christmas decorations are in a storage unit over 700 miles away. My husband continues to search for a job. The newspaper industry he worked for is collapsing, and this complicates his job search. By Christmas, we will have lived without his salary for almost a year.

Journeying to Pennsylvania for the holidays is not in our plans right now. Travel in the winter months up the Appalachians into the Northeast is a tricky, often hazardous project. We learned this when we drove from Pennsylvania to Georgia for a December wedding and got caught in a sudden snowstorm. We managed to find an exit in the blinding whiteness and spent the night in a hotel.

Even if I drove for two days to get our decorations and two days to bring them back, I'd have trouble transporting them when we move. Our cars were full of things we really needed when we drove to North Carolina. There is a possibility that we might have to head north in a few weeks for some winter clothing, but I wouldn't want to add anything else to our nomadic luggage.

Money is tight. I don't need to explain how that changes things. You can imagine it.

So what will we do? What will happen to us? How will I keep our spirits up and create a season of joy and hope for us -- on a shoestring, hundreds of miles from home, facing anxious prospects?

This will be a holiday to remember.

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Join me here for it at the end of each week on Apple Pie. Thursdays and Fridays, I'll tell our story.